Love Yourself and the Rest Doesn’t Matter | VictorSchueller.com
By Dr. Victor Schueller | belief systems
Facebook user? Click the “Like” button below and get my newest publication, “Unlock Your Inner Awesome Today” for free! That’s it!
“It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes.” ~Sally Field
I was at a conference in California last year, and I was talking with a group of people after the first day of the conference had come to an end. We were hanging out in the hotel bar…I can’t remember what I had said to one of the people in the group, but it had to do with her willingness to physically do something that I would have categorized as rather “silly” in front of the other members of the group. Perhaps alcohol had something to do with it. 🙂
Her response to me was this: “You’re from the Midwest, aren’t you?” Shocked that she was dead on (I live in Wisconsin), I responded with, “Yes…How did you know?”
She responded by saying, “Because you care about what other people think.”
Now, whether she button-holed me into a stereotype or not, she was right — I did care about what other people thought of me. There is no way I would have done anything “silly” like that in front of people I didn’t know. No way.
I still struggle with this…Do you? I still have that little voice in the back of my mind, saying something like, “Yes, but what will other people think?” I have gotten a lot better at quieting that little voice over the past year, and I have gotten much better at saying some not so pleasant things to it, to get it to stay quiet!
Regardless of where we live, the fact remains the same: sometimes we worry about what other people think. Sometimes we worry about whether people will approve of us or not, and our worries about garnering this approval from others sometimes suppresses our true selves from being revealed. Simply put, sometimes we worry more about loving other people rather than loving ourselves.
Why do we seek validation from others? Our brains are designed to make us want to be part of the group. It’s actually painful to be isolated from others! That’s a big reason why. The other reason? I think it’s because to be accepted boosts our self esteem and morale. However, to rely on outside validation to boost our self esteem, according to Vipin Mehta, is to rely on what is called “false” self esteem. It’s self esteem that comes from outside sources, rather than “true” self esteem, which stems from self validation and self love.
If we simply spend more time working on excavating new treasures within us, rather than seeking approval from others, we’ll have a lifetime of lessons to learn. It sure it takes a lot of work, but the rewards are substantial — just like an archaeologist has to work hard to dig and find the buried treasures in the earth, we have to work hard to uncover the subconscious glory that resides within each of us — the greatness that lies buried and covered with all the conscious beliefs and perceptions we have laid over the top.
So it’s time to get started — it’s time to focus on loving ourselves. If we love ourselves and continue to unearth the hidden treasures buried within us, we won’t have to worry about what other people say or do. It just doesn’t really matter. All that matters is that we learn how to love ourselves and love how great we really are inside. We just need to take the time to find the greatness that lies within each of us.
It’s time to seek validation from within! It’s time to dig out those treasures that reside within us, ready to enrich our lives with the love and greatness that is inside! It’s there — we just have to keep digging. Love yourself, and the rest doesn’t matter.
P.S. Have you signed up for the “Coming Back To Life” e-Course? Click on the link below to find out more, as well as how you can save $30 when you sign up today!
Photo source: freedigitalphotos.net
By clicking the banner above, you are clicking on an affiliate link, which means a portion of your purchase will go toward vanquishing mental mediocrity worldwide! 🙂