Can I Change Who I Am? Do I Need To? | VictorSchueller.com

Are you okay with who you are?  Or, do you feel a deeper need to change who you are?

Maybe you’re unsure.  Maybe you really are okay with who you are, but you feel a sort of “external” pressure to change who you are because you’re worried about the impact you have on other people and your interactions.

Maybe you know you could stand to make some changes, but it’s not always easy to accept that changes are necessary.

Even if those may be the case, you still may wonder if change is even possible.

Have you ever wondered that?  Have you wondered if it’s even possible to even change who you are?

First off, let’s start with the “why.”  Why is it that you feel you need to change?  Is it an internal push?  Or, is it more external?

If its external, let’s start by asking a few questions.  Are you feeling the need to change because someone had said something to you?  Is it because you’re worried about what other people think of you?  Is it because you’ve been told you need to “change your ways” by someone else?

If it’s an internal push, we can ask similar questions.  Do you feel you need to change because you’re experiencing negative emotions as a result of life’s circumstances?  Is it because you are tired of coming back to the same situation over and over again?  Do you simply feel “stuck,” and that change is necessary to move on?

Change is hard.

No matter why you feel you may need a change, change is hard.  And, based on my own personal experience, and in dealing with others who are struggling with this concept of change, it seems that the most difficult part about dealing with change is the thought of changing who we are.

I mean, let’s face it.  We are all imperfect.  We all have our flaws.  And, deep down, we really know it’s okay.  We all know, deep down, that we are imperfect.  And, that’s okay.

So, if we are all imperfect, and we can all stand to improve, then in that imperfection we are about as perfect as we’re going to be.

But, here’s the thing — when we think about changing who we are, it scares us.  It scares us because of what it means to change.  We like who we are.  We’re okay with who we are.  It’s just that some things can stand for a little improvement and tweaking to make life a little more wonderful, right?

Absolutely — I’m in agreement.  So here’s the distinction, as I see it.

We don’t have to change who we are…

We don’t have to change who we are.  It’s just that maybe we want to change how we are, how we act, and what we do.

That’s much easier to swallow, isn’t it?

It’s not about changing the “who.”  It’s about changing the “how” and the “what.”  It’s about already utilizing what we have within us, and bringing that out to enhance our lives and our interactions with others.

We already have the capacity to be friendly, congenial, loving, caring, kind, empathic, compassionate, and joyful.  We all have that capacity.  You’re no exception.

The only change we need to implement is in how and when we choose to bring out those positive characteristics.

Every interaction is a choice.  Do we choose to be loving, or not?  Do we choose to be compassionate, or not?

It is the power of thought that will empower us to implement the change that we desire to move to a more desirable place internally.

At the end of the day, if you can think back on it and realize that you consciously chose to be loving, kind, and compassionate, when you know that in the past you didn’t necessarily act in that way, it’s an empowering reflection.

Then, at that time, you can finally realize that yes, we can change.  We can change how we are and what we do.  While we can’t necessarily change who we are, you’ll realize that you never needed to.

We are who we are, and we don’t need to change who we are.  We can enable change through our choices and thoughts and achieve powerful results.

How about you?  Do you struggle with change?  Have you battled with whether or not you need to change who you are?  Was this helpful in your personal discovery?  I’d like to know how this article impacted you!  Please share in the comments below.  I promise to respond if you do.

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