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The following is a guest post by Otiti Jasmine of Radiant Soul Space

If you’ve ever embarked on serious personal development, you’re familiar with the point where it feels like your old layers are cracking and peeling away to reveal a truer you underneath. It’s exhilarating and frightening because you don’t know what you’ll find but can’t wait to discover it, yes?

At the same time, though, it can also be incredibly painful leaving behind the comfort of your old ways and trying on something radical to meet the growing need for more.

It’s not enough to have a job anymore; it has to be one that feeds your soul as well as your pocket.

It’s not enough to just have a partner or be in a relationship; it has to be with someone you can really be yourself with, someone you can grow with, someone who can return your love and support your decision to change.

It’s not enough to just say you “want change”, either; you have to know how far you’re willing to go to meet your dream and what you’ll sacrifice to get there.

As you move towards your vision, you inch farther away from your comfort zone and deeper into the wilderness that is unknown territory. The deeper you get into this wilderness, the more your old world breaks and rearranges around you.
So what do you do after you’ve taken the leap only to slam into a wall of pain and indecision?

1. Take a step back: figuratively speaking, of course. I’ve learned that inner change is a delicate process, and sometimes the huge burst of energy that drives you forward in the beginning fizzles out when your lizard brain figures out what’s going on. This is when resistance rears up and halts further movement.

Taking a step back gives room for a breather and a progress check. Have you celebrated how far you’ve come yet? It might be a good time to beam at your choice to change and reassure yourself you’re doing the right thing.

2. Meditate: either on the mat or with pen and paper. What’s this wall telling you? What’s the pain showing you? Maybe it’s time to ease off on intentional action for a while and just let your subconscious process the disruption of your old routine.

Using any books or other resources for inspiration and pointers? Could be you’re verging on information overload and need time away from all that, or you’re going too fast and trying to rush the process, in which case you’ve slammed to a halt so you can breathe and resume a more sustainable pace.

3. Reach out: no personal development journey is complete without a support network. Who knows about your evolution? Who’s up to speed on the changes in your spirit and the reasons behind them? Share with those who get the value of your mission and boost you when your resolve wavers. Transitions are tricky at the best of times, and they can be downright nasty if you lose focus of what you’re trying to achieve.

Bent on becoming more aware of your intuition and flowing with it? Determined to follow your dream of a more robust spiritual practice or an entrepreneurial venture? Get help and get it fast before you’re stuck and wondering if you can pull it off after all.

4. Remember. Circle back to what prompted your decision to change — is it still relevant? Does it matter enough for you to follow through? Being very clear about why you’ve chosen your path will help you in moments of doubt and fear of failure.

Working on your inner being isn’t exactly something you can track or measure with pinpoint accuracy; it’s something you have to allow unfold at its own pace. Sometimes you’ll have to make like an explosive and blow things up, and other times you’ll have to be as still as a clear pool of water so your inner landscape has a chance to settle.

Waiting in the space between old and new is giving yourself room to really make lasting change and stick to your plan. As such, realise that slamming into a wall of pain and indecision isn’t such a bad thing; in fact, it’s a very good thing.

It shows that you’re evolving, and breaking free of restrictive patterns, and it’s that break for freedom that feels so weird and uncomfortable. Bear with it because it’s good pain. You’re on the right track and just gotta hang in there to make it all worth it. Now is not the time to lose heart and slink back to your comfort zone; now is the time to stand strong and believe that rolling with the pain will get you even closer to where you want to be.

Why? Because when you’ve taken the time to pause and reflect, given yourself a chance to rest, you find that you’re ready for the next leg of your journey —clarity and all. Sometimes a pause is necessary so you know when to say “enough” and when to ask for more.
Whenever you feel like your world is breaking and your spirit can’t bear the change after all, remember that some time off and deep processing will have you pumped to continue before you know it.

Because at the end of the day, it’s not about how big or how fast change happens, it’s about how true it is and how deep it goes. Right? 😉

So I’ll leave you with this question: what are you going to do the next time it feels like your world is breaking and you can’t go on?

Hello! My name is Otiti and my passion is to ignite your soul to live your dreams. I’m fascinated by the deep questions and meaning of life, which is probably what turned me into a soul visionary, heart hugger, and huge love advocate. I believe we are all radiant souls, and you can find me urging you to dance in your brilliance at my blog Radiant Soul Space. Also come say hi on Twitter or Facebook; I love to connect! 

Photo source: freedigitalphotos.net

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“Being willing to give love and being willing to receive love are the greatest motivators of transformation.  Being loved and letting someone love you is the most mystical and magical power of transformation.” ~Vipin Mehta

I had a wonderful time talking with Vipin Mehta, who will be my guest on my radio show this coming Monday, the 11th, and on the 25th as well.  I don’t want to give away too much from our conversation, but we were discussing the power of the mind, and how we can transform a negative emotion into more positive and constructive emotions.  I asked Vipin if this could be done in an instant, or if it required some practice and patience.

His response was that it doesn’t come so easily, but he also gave some great recommendations for transforming the negative into the positive, and I wanted to share that with you today.  Vipin said the key to making this transformation has to do with consciousness.  In other words, we need to “expand” our consciousness.  Essentially, there are different levels of consciousness.  We have the brain, which is a physical object, and it is therefore governed by physical laws (physics).  We also have the conscious mind, which is beyond the space-time continuum, and so therefore it is governed by what is called (metaphysics).  The next level “up” is the subconscious mind, and then the next level beyond that is the unconscious mind.  These higher levels of consciousness bring us closer to what Vipin calls “divine energy.”

If we can expand our consciousness into the higher levels of consciousness, then we can start to access the power that lies within that “divine energy.”  Some people would call that intuition; some call it speaking with God; some people would call it yet something else.  Expanding the consciousness is done through the steps Vipin details as “attention, attentiveness, awareness, awareness of being aware.” This can be accomplished through prayer or meditation; we get ever closer to tapping into that divine energy, which provides us with vast knowledge which seemingly defies our natural laws and logic.

Then we moved on to talk about something called the “elixir of forgiveness.”  I didn’t even know what this was, but Vipin was kind enough to share his thoughts about this concept.  He said that all emotions can be positive or negative.  “Anger” is a negative energy, but the same emotion displayed positively is “intensity.”  “Jealousy” is a negative emotion, but when channeled positively, it is displayed as “inspiration.”

The way we can move from harboring negative emotions to their positive counterpart is by utilizing this “elixir of forgiveness.”  It’s a four-step process.

The first step is recognizing that you are experiencing the negative emotion and recognize and overcome the resistance you feel to acknowledge that emotion.  The second step is to forgive yourself, because it is you who created this reality, which is the emotion.  This second step, according to Vipin, is the most difficult step, because it requires tremendous courage and vulnerability.  The third step in the process is to forgive others, and then the fourth step is to ask others to forgive you.

The reason you want to make sure you don’t leave out this fourth step is because it keeps you humble.  If you don’t ask forgiveness, you may walk away feeling that you are better or of higher morality than others, because you are handing out the forgiveness to others.  Vipin said that when you ask others for forgiveness, in the end it creates the “radiance of forgiveness” and releases tremendous amounts of energy which you can harness and direct to produce change, and then essentially you will transition from the negative to positive emotion.

Four steps: Acknowledge and overcome resistance, forgive yourself, forgive others, ask others to forgive you.  It’s the elixir of forgiveness, and a powerful tool!  Try it today!  Let me know what you think!

Photo: freedigitalphotos.net