How you can use attention to decrease stress and overwhelm

It’s very easy when you are busy to let the pressure of getting things done (or not getting things done) to cause overwhelm and anxiety. It’s that idea that there are “always things to do” that perpetually leaves us with an unending list and reminder that our work is never done.

We seek an escape from this relentless pressure to perform. We try to find relief by seeking activities which are pleasurable and fun, but despite our best efforts, we still can find ourselves running from pleasure to pleasure and again feel that same “chasing after things” feeling. We end up right back where we started, realizing that we’re too busy!

Struggling to find balance

The challenge of finding balance between our work and home is very real and very difficult. And the more we seek balance, the more stress it can place upon us. You may be reading this, by now asking yourself, “Just what doesn’t cause stress and overwhelm? Everything causes overwhelm!”

Presence is the key

You see, simply striving for things is the cause of unpleasantness. Having a list of things can cause us to be less than happy if we allow the idea of us failing to check everything off our list to be a reminder of our failures or unmet objectives.

Whenever we set ourselves up to have to perform to a certain standard, or accomplish a certain task, only to not meet that objective, we are setting the stages for stress and overwhelm. For example, if we strive to send out thirty thank-you cards by the end of the day, yet fail to do so, that in itself can be a stressor.

It’s the failure to accomplish what we desire that is the source of pain. It is the unmet objective. It’s the reminder that we’ve failed to deliver for high performers that is the source of stress. There is a very real solution to this problem, and it comes from simply using presence as you live your life.

What is presence?

Presence simply is the act of deliberately attending to whatever you are doing at the present moment — that’s it. Whether it’s washing the dishes, typing an email, folding laundry, working to accomplish a “to-do” on a list, or anything else, presence is simply being 100 percent in the moment and engrossed in the present moment.

The reason this works is because you are not thinking about what else is on your list of “to-dos.” You are not focusing on what you didn’t accomplish in the past. You’re not worrying about the future, as it has not yet arrived. When you are engrossed in the present, the only thing that matters is now.

The reality is that this is 100 percent true anyway. There is no past or future — just the now. It’s just that we spend our moments in time travel, worrying about the next ten things we need to do, or reminding ourselves of the last ten failures to deliver on our promises to ourselves, thereby robbing us of the wonderful present moment. In reality, the present is all that exists.

Your mind can only handle one thing at a time. No matter how hard you try, your attention can only be fully placed on one thing in the present moment. The stress and overwhelm comes when you mentally try to juggle multiple things at one time.

How you can put this to practice

Lists are great

We can only do one thing at a time. Write a list of all the things you wish to accomplish. If you want to make this even more powerful, write down six items you wish to complete tomorrow — write them down before you go to bed. Then, one at a time, complete those items the next day. Do one at a time, and only begin the second item after the first is completed, and so forth.

Hand off the overload

Some people find it helpful to take a full inventory of all the things they would like to accomplish, and then realize the improbability of doing it all on their own. Let’s face it — it’s unlikely that we mere mortals can do everything.

Why not divide your list of things to do into two columns? Make one column the things you are going to work on, and then make the other column with items that you know you can’t get to in the near future, but you are giving it up to the “universe” or God, or whatever supernatural presence that is way above and beyond you as far as capability of making things happen.

You’re not going to do it anyway, so why not give it up to a higher power? At least then you have a chance of it happening outside of your own physical doing!

When we find the ability to simply remain in the present moment, we will harness the power it possesses — the calm, the focus, the efficiency, and more. Presence is more than a practice — it’s a tool that we can use every moment of every day to capture the best we have to offer the world we live in.

Why should we continue to agonize over what we need to do? Why not simply choose one thing to focus on, and then see it through, fully engrossed in its beauty, until it is completed? Then, we get to live the wonderful experience again, simply by choosing yet another thing for which we can be present, and do it all over again.

Presence is a gift we can give ourselves, and it is so simple to practice, and so wonderful to experience. Today’s a great day to start.

Have you ever read a book that had such an impact on you that you were never the same after reading it? I’ve been positively impacted by many books, and so I thought I would share my list of the top 6 influential books I’ve read with you. Below is a list of the books that, to date, have impacted my life the most after having read them. Included with the names of the books are links to the books and my explanation as to why these books were impactful for me.

Here they are, in no particular order:

Tribal Leadership: Leveraging Natural Groups to Build a Thriving Organization

Why it was impactful:  This book was instrumental in my understanding of human nature and how we organize ourselves into “tribes” when we work in communities, namely organizational communities.  I learned about how people (and organizations) can settle into “stages” that are both identifiable and predictable, and more interestingly and importantly, how to use leverage to move people to a higher level of functioning to have a positive impact on the organization.  It was by reading this book I learned the importance of core values and what can happen in a negative way when we don’t identify and embrace them.  Whether you are a leader in a business or not, this book can be an eye-opener.  Anyone who works in or for any sort of organization, whether it be a for-profit or non-profit, will benefit tremendously from reading this book.  If you enjoy research-based publications, this one is for you.  The back of the book is loaded with the research that substantiates the observations and conclusions shared throughout the book.

I actually interviewed Dave Logan on my radio show, and if you’d like to hear that interview just click here.

Autobiography of a Yogi

Why it was impactful:  This book introduced me to the work of Paramahansa Yogananda, and through Yogananda, I was introduced to the concept of self-realization.  Self-realization has come to mean to me that I need to search within myself to make a difference on the outside of my life.  Through the personal pursuit of self-realization, I’ve come to seek a personal relationship with God, and I made meditation something that I don’t just talk about, but actually practice regularly (daily).  In the pursuit of self-realization, I’ve reduced my blood pressure, improved my diet, improved my overall health, and have less stress and anger.  I’ve come to recognize God’s grace and God’s presence in everyone and everything in the world.  This book opened the door to the embedded messages in sacred scripture and has allowed me to read these books with a new perspective and forge a closer relationship with God, as well as enhancing my spiritual and physical health.

The Biology of Belief: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter and Miracles

Why it was impactful:  Bruce Lipton’s’ breakthrough book shows how our beliefs can switch on and off our genes which can have a positive impact on health.  He also shares a very interesting take on how biology bridges into spirituality later on in the book.  The reason I enjoyed this book so much was because Bruce has a great way of taking difficult concepts and making them easy to understand and blowing your mind at the same time.  For example, he shares how the cell membrane is very similar to a microprocessor and is actually the brain of the cell, not the nucleus like we’ve always been told.  If you’re looking for proof that validates how what we think has a tremendous impact on our physical being, look no further than this book.  You’ll not only learn a lot about science but about how the human body and mind are intertwined and inseparable.

I also interviewed Bruce Lipton on my radio show, and if you’d like to listen to that interview, click here.  Part 2 is found here.

Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships

Why it was impactful: This book has really changed the way I interact with other people and, quite honestly, has served as the foundation for much of my coaching work, my book, and much of what I do in my work as a speaker and presenter.  Our interactions with other people start with what we say and how we say what we say to others.  This book has shown a new way of communication to me, and it has positively impacted my personal and professional relationships.  It has helped reduce stress and angst in my life, and it has helped me move from expectation to understanding and empathy.  Marshall Rosenberg has really left us a wonderful gift in this book, as he gets us to understand that concepts like “good and bad,” and “right and wrong” don’t belong in our dialogue.  He helps us move from damaging our relationships to saving them through connecting at the heart.  And, to be honest, if you’ve ever watched Marshall in a YouTube video, where he uses his jackal and giraffe puppets or puts on his “special” listening device, you can’t help but laugh in amusement and appreciation for his special way of transforming our interpersonal relationships.  If you’re ever looking for a comprehensive and thorough way to transform your interactions with other people, this book will give you all you need.

Holy Bible

Why it was impactful: When I have struggled for answers, I’ve looked to the Bible for help.  The most refreshing thought about my relationship with the Bible is that even though it has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember, I get more out of it now than I ever have.  What I have come to understand about the sacred books is that there are different ways that we can read them.  We can read the book at face value like we would read any other storybook.  If you read the Bible this way you’ll be treated to a story that provides lessons for living along the way.  However, if you read the Bible in a “deeper” way you will pull meaning out of the words that are metaphysical and even more spiritual than meets the eye upon the first read.  The Bible is chock-full of symbolism in its words and stories.  If you’re searching for a deep and personal relationship with God the messages are there, hidden in plain sight.  Once I started reading the Bible with a deeper appreciation for the symbolism and hidden messages in it, it became much more intriguing, educational, and spiritually valuable to be as a guide.  If you have a hard time making sense out of the Bible, I recommend finding a study Bible, which provides interpretations and meanings of the passages throughout the text.

Bhagavad-Gita

Why it was impactful: If you’re not familiar with the Bhagavad-Gita, it is a Hindu scripture – sort of an equivalent to the Bible.  Again, you can read this book from cover to cover like a storybook and be treated to a very compelling story that will provide you with some life lessons.  However, this book was not intended to be read just like a storybook.  The symbolism and references to a deep relationship with God and the pursuit of self-realization are very much alive in this book.  To be honest, because of my Christian background the Bhagavad-Gita was a bit of a confusing read for me at first.  If you are taking it on for the first time and want to get as much benefit as you can from it I recommend that you purchase a version of the text which includes an interpretation of the passages.  Otherwise, the read will be quick and you’ll wonder where the wisdom can be found on the pages.  The link I provided is to a version of the book called “Bhagavad-Gita As It Is,” and it is the most widely used version of the book because of the interpretation that it includes.  For first time Gita readers the translation and explanation will be most valuable.

My Honorable Mentions:

Global Healing: Thinking Outside the Box

 

 

177 Mental Toughness Secrets of the World Class: The Thought Processes, Habits, and Philosophies of the Great Ones

 

The Emotional Life of Your Brain: How Its Unique Patterns Affect the Way You Think, Feel, and Live–and How You Can Change Them

 

Descartes’ Error: Emotion, Reason, and the Human Brain

 

The Divine Romance: Collected Talks and Essays on Realizing God in Daily Life – Volume 2

Do you have some books that you think others would enjoy reading? Feel free to share your top influential books in the comments below.  I’d love to see your recommendations!

A couple of weeks ago I was talking to a group about simple ways to find more happiness in life.  I shared a story about a man who was very successful in that he had his own thriving business, had lots of money, and loved his work as a business owner.  Someone had asked that man why he worked so many long and hard hours.

He answered that it was because he wanted the things that came with success.  He wanted things that were enjoyable to touch, taste, smell, see and hear.  The other man then asked why he wanted those things.

On it went, the successful man answering why, and the other continuing to ask “why” back, again and again.  Eventually, they got down to the core reason why he did what he did, and that was to be “happy.”

We all want to be happy

If we all were asked the same question – “Why do you do the things you do?” – the core answer for many of us would be because we too want to be “happy.”  But some of us are “unhappy” most days of our lives, and the idea of happiness seems so distant and so unrealistic at times that we become pessimistic about life and doubtful about the possibility of happiness.

But, what is happiness, really?  If you ask ten people you’ll probably get ten slightly different answers.  One may tell you being with their family is happiness.  Another may say happiness is to have meaning in life.  Still, another may suggest for them happiness is having stability.  It’s easy to see that happiness is defined by many as an idea or vision rather than an emotion.

In reality, however, happiness itself is an emotion.  It is just like sadness, anger, frustration, or joy.  It’s fleeting.  So what we’re trying to do is capture something that changes from instant to instant and hold it indefinitely in a sustained state.  This is virtually impossible for most people, simply because we don’t have years of practice in the ways of meditation and deep introspection that is required to find a continual and perpetual state of bliss.

Instead, we find ourselves with the challenge of understanding that what we believe happiness to be and what happiness really is are two very different things.  And if we continue to chase after happiness the emotion with the idea of realizing the vision of what happiness represents for us, we will find ourselves unsuccessful and, eventually, unhappy too.

May I suggest to you that instead of holding on to this idea of “happiness,” that you focus on ways that you can become more resilient, have a more positive outlook, be more aware of your surroundings, look inward more often, and develop your ability to stay focused and fixed in concentration on a single task or idea.  The reason I suggest this is because these are some of the emotional styles that have been identified through roughly forty years of research into our emotions by Dr. Richard Davidson at the University of Wisconsin.

There are six emotional styles that “define” our personality, and these play a huge role in how “happy” we are from moment to moment.  For example, if you are more resilient, meaning that you can bounce back relatively quickly from setbacks, you are generally going to sustain a more positive emotional state, so to speak, more often.  If you’re interested in learning more about these emotional styles and even take your own emotional style quiz (and receive tips on how to improve some of these if you’d like), please follow this link.

The good news is that you can alter your emotional state through what Davidson calls “effortful training,” but the not-so-great news is that this type of training does take some time.  Chances are you’re reading this because you’re trying to figure out ways that you can help yourself now (while starting on that effortful training too, right?).

The “I am” practice

One thing I suggest to help you determine whether you are “on the right track” in life for you is to do a very fast and easy exercise called the “I am…” practice.  To get started, find a blank sheet of paper and a pen or pencil, and write the words “I am” at the top of the page.  Next, think about how you would describe yourself at your very best — think about how you would view yourself in perfection and write those words down.

You may write words like, “loving,” “kind,” “compassionate,” “silly,” “respectful,” and the like.  Just keep writing down as many words as you can think of that describe the perfect version of you.  After you believe that you’ve come up with a sufficient number of words, take a look a what you’ve written.  These are your personal core values.

Core values are your “moral code” for the life you lead.  It’s the rules by which you play the game of life, and when you follow those rules, life is “better” more often than it is not.  For example, if you wrote down that you are “honest,” then “honesty” would be the core value.  If someone asked you to be dishonest, or if you were dishonest yourself, chances are you would not feel “good” about yourself because you are acting in contradiction to one of your core values.

Generally, if someone is rather unhappy in their life one of the reasons may simply be that they are living a life that is not in alignment with their core values.  After all, if you’re playing the game of life by rules that oppose the ones you’ve established for yourself, it’s not going to be a fun game at all.  While there may be other causes for unhappiness (obviously), if you are struggling to know if you’re on the “right” path for you in life, starting with an assessment of how closely you’re aligned with your core values is a great way to begin.

I suggest pursuing those “virtuous” values, like love, generosity, kindness, and respect.  Start by making a purposeful effort to embody those virtues as often as you can, while being mindful and aware of the times when you begin to violate those values.  For example, you may find that you employ sarcasm on a regular basis throughout the day.  This does not align with love, kindness, or respect.  Once you pick up on this, you can turn things around and refrain from sarcasm until it becomes something you don’t do anymore.

One last tip – listen to those nearest and dearest to you.  Are they telling you things about your behavior?  For example, my wife had told me that I seem to need to have the last word in conversations or discussions.  Was she right in her assessment?  Well, after thinking about it and being mindful in my conversations, yes, she made an accurate statement.  Sometimes it takes our ability to set the ego aside and listen to those who not only see us as we are but also are not afraid to tell us to learn of those things that we do that are not in alignment with our values.

If you’re looking for a way to get started today to determine whether you are on the “right” track for you in life, just take a few moments to describe who you are at your very best, and then do some soul searching and practice some introspection to see how closely you are aligned with your own personal core values.  Chances are if you find that you’re closely aligned with your values, life is pretty good for you.  But if life is not so wonderful more days than not, I suspect you’ll find that there are some core values that really mean a lot to you from which you are far removed.  The more distant you are from your core values the more pain you experience from that distance.  If you are suffering, take some time to really think about what you can do right now, here, today, to start honoring your core values more often.  It just takes a few small steps in the “right” direction for you, focused on your core values, to get you started on the “right” path in life for you.

 

Photo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/53771866@N05/6162232402

Do you sometimes struggle to keep a positive mindset in the midst of negativity from others, or under circumstances that are less than ideal?

We all have a difficult time staying upbeat and positive, especially when we find ourselves in a situation that we didn’t expect, didn’t ask for.

When those times come that we struggle to keep that positive mentality, it’s then that we need to take some time to do a personal inventory of our own values and ideals.

You can do this right on the spot, but it’s even better if you can do some preparation ahead of time, so that you are ready when the time comes.

Try doing an “I am” exercise

This is a really quick exercise that you can do anytime and anywhere to re-focus and center in on your values and ideals.  All you need to do is grab a piece of paper and write the words “I am” at the top of the paper.

Next, just write words and phrases that describe your ideal self — your “best you” that you can think of.  For example, you may write “kind,” “loving,” “caring,” “good listener,” and other similar words and phrases.

After you’re done, just take a look at what you wrote down.  You just captured your values.  These are the ideals that you live by, and when you are living your life in alignment with these values, you are bringing your best to the world you live in.

Keep that list with you, and let those values and ideals be your guiding principles for the rest of your day, week, month, or even year.  You can do this again and again if you’d like, and in reality, the more you take time to do a personal inventory of your values and ideals the more readily they’ll come to your conscious awareness when you are challenged with a difficult situation or exposed to negativity coming from others, and you’re invited to participate!

The more you practice writing down your values, or running through them in your head, especially when you suspect that you may be walking into a negative or unfavorable situation, the more you will be prepared to maintain those values and ideals in the midst of your challenges.

If one of your values, for example, is “love,” then ask yourself how you can bring love to every interaction you have with another person throughout the day.  When someone criticizes another person in your presence, ask yourself how you can bring love to this situation to turn things around and make things more positive.

We all have values and ideals that, if we lived up to them and by them every moment of every day, would make this world a better place.  If you can make a regular practice and eventual habit of reviewing your values and ideals, you will be bringing your best version of yourself along with you no matter where you go, and you will definitely make a positive impact on those around you.

I really enjoying learning about the customs and traditions of the Native Americans.  As long as I can remember, the history and culture of these great people has fascinated me.  A few months ago I happened upon a website, which shared what they called the “Native American Code of Ethics.”  After reading through this code, I thought it was absolutely beautiful, and I wanted to share it with you, so that you can learn of it, be blessed to have come across, it and benefit from it as I have.

I can’t help but think that if we all lived up to this code of ethics this world would be a better place, and we would have much more enjoyable lives.

Apparently there are many “codes” out there.  If you do a simple search of “Native American Code of Ethics” you’ll find different varieties of codes of ethics, but they are in many ways very similar to each other.  This particular code that I will share with you comes from the website nativevillage.org, and they are sharing the code that originally appeared in a publication called the “Inner-Tribal Times” in October of 1994.

How well do you measure up to this “Code of Ethics?”

1. Rise with the sun to pray. Pray alone. Pray often. The Great Spirit will listen, if you only speak.

2. Be tolerant of those who are lost on their path. Ignorance, conceit, anger, jealousy and greed stem from a lost soul. Pray that they will find guidance.

3. Search for yourself, by yourself. Do not allow others to make your path for you. It is your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.

4. Treat the guests in your home with much consideration. Serve them the best food, give them the best bed and treat them with respect and honor.

5. Do not take what is not yours whether from a person, a community, the wilderness or from a culture. It was not earned nor given. It is not yours.

6. Respect all things that are placed upon this earth – whether it be people or plant.

7. Honor other people’s thoughts, wishes and words. Never interrupt another or mock or rudely mimic them. Allow each person the right to personal expression.

8. Never speak of others in a bad way. The negative energy that you put out into the universe will multiply when it returns to you.

9. All persons make mistakes. And all mistakes can be forgiven.

10. Bad thoughts cause illness of the mind, body and spirit. Practice optimism.

11. Nature is not FOR us, it is a PART of us. They are part of your worldly family.

12. Children are the seeds of our future. Plant love in their hearts and water them with wisdom and life’s lessons. When they are grown, give them space to grow.

13. Avoid hurting the hearts of others. The poison of your pain will return to you.

14. Be truthful at all times. Honesty is the test of one’s will within this universe.

15. Keep yourself balanced. Your Mental self, Spiritual self, Emotional self, and Physical self – all need to be strong, pure and healthy. Work out the body to strengthen the mind. Grow rich in spirit to cure emotional ails.

16. Make conscious decisions as to who you will be and how you will react. Be responsible for your own actions.

17. Respect the privacy and personal space of others. Do not touch the personal property of others – especially sacred and religious objects. This is forbidden.

18. Be true to yourself first. You cannot nurture and help others if you cannot nurture and help yourself first.

19. Respect others religious beliefs. Do not force your belief on others.

20. Share your good fortune with others. Participate in charity.

I especially enjoyed numbers three, twelve, and fifteen.  There are also some on this list that are a struggle for me to live up to.

How about you?  Are there any that resonate with you?  How about those which are challenges?  If you’d like to share, please leave your comments below!

 

Photo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/red11group/4758464068

No doubt you’ve been told somewhere, sometime in your life to “be happy,” or to “just be positive,” or to “be” something as long as it’s not negative or undesirable.

Given that we’ve all had that experience (some much more so than others), let me ask you this:

How exactly do you “be” happy?

Ever think about that?

How can you “be” a state of emotion?  How can you “be” a state of being?

If you’ve got it figured out, and I am missing something, please let me know, because I keep coming at this from many different angles, and I struggle to understand.

Because, for me, to “be” something means that I have to first quantify what it is that’s alive in me.  What does “happy” look like for me?  Is is something I “am?”  Because if happiness was “what” I was, then I could see how it would be easy to “be” something that I “am.”

But it doesn’t work that way for me.  An emotion is a reflection or a signal to me that I am satisfying a need that I have or an indication that I am “doing” something that is in alignment with my values.  When I experience a positive emotion I know that I am getting what I need and living my values.  When I experience a negative emotion, I know that I’m not getting something, or I am misaligned in comparison to my core values.

So perhaps what we could work on is “doing” something that we know will generate a positive emotion, instead of trying to “be” happy or cheerful or whatever.

Because, after all, what I do to generate positive emotions in me may generate the exact opposite type of emotion in you.

So, while some of you may still be told to get busy “being” something, maybe we can master our interpretive skills and hear them say something different.

Maybe when someone says “be positive,” they’re really saying, “I am anxious when I see your arms crossed and unsmiling face because I have a need for cooperation and harmony.  Would you please tell me what’s going on and what you’re thinking?”

Perhaps that’s it.  Perhaps the other person is in pain, and their instructions to “be” something is actually a request from them, asking you to alleviate the pain.

It’s possible.  Well, at least that’s my best explanation for making sense out of why we are being told to “be” something, as if asking someone to “be” something is an all-inclusive, universally (and easily) defined demand that anyone and everyone can (and should) do.

So, while others may continue to focus on alleviating their pain by telling us what to “be,” I’m going to focus on improving my listening skills, and try to figure out exactly what is causing their pain, and work on actually “doing” something that will generate more preferred emotions.  It sure beats trying to figure out how to “be” something.

The next time someone tells you to “just be positive,” perhaps you can give to them through your listening, and help them alleviate their pain.  After all, if they want you to “be positive,” it’s probably a great clue as to what they really want, but are not getting.  See?  It’s not that hard to become a sharper listener after all.  They’re practically handing it to you.

Let’s “be” better listeners.  No — scratch that. (Did you catch it?)  Let’s “listen to hear other people’s pain” and help them experience life in a more wonderful way.  Let’s all be wonderful, okay? (I did it again!)  Let’s all do things that help make this a more wonderful world.  Okay, enough said.  I’m done.

 

Photo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/krayker/4312985916

Do you brush your teeth twice a day? If you’re like the majority of Americans, you do.

You might think that this is an odd question to start off with on the topic of happiness, but it actually couldn’t be better placed. One of the few habits that has become universally accepted focuses on the health of teeth. And just like perfect teeth don’t come without daily brushing, success and wealth don’t just happen overnight; they are the result of a lifestyle. A set of simple, daily tasks that, compounded over time, lead to one’s ultimate success. If perfect teeth, wealth and success are the result of simple actions repeated daily, could a qualitative trait such as happiness develop in the same way?

After over a decade of research, Shawn Achor, a world-renowned positive psychologist and the author of the Happiness Advantage, has finally found the answer to this question; and I want to share his findings with you. In just two minutes (the time it takes to brush teeth) we can form habits that are scientifically proven to improve mental health and happiness over time. To make matters even more exciting, Shawn has discovered through his research that it is actually happiness that ultimately leads to success, not the other way around like the age-old theory suggests. So if happiness is the result of a simple set of daily habits, and also ultimately leads to success, what can we do to become happier?  Without further ado, I present to you Shawn’s five habits of happiness:

1. Gratitude

An extensive study on the subject of gratitude cites that a one-time act of thoughtful gratitude produced an immediate 10% increase in happiness and 35% reduction in depressive symptoms. Although the effects disappeared after six months, there is a way to permanently increase happiness. In another test, participants were instructed to write down three positive occurrences and their causes every night for one week. The long-lasting impact was incredible.

 “After one week, participants were 2% happier than before, but in follow-up tests, their happiness kept on increasing, from 5% at one month, to 9% at six months. All this, even though they were only instructed to journal for one week.”

There will always be positives and negatives in life, so you’re far better off directing your attention to the positives.

 2. The Doubler

An article by Joseph M. Carver, Ph.D., suggests that the human brain cannot distinguish between imagination (visualization, dreams) and actual experience. We can use this knowledge to live a much happier existence. Once per day, especially when feeling down, focus on one positive experience in your life and write down as many details as you can remember from it. The details should range from the environment of the experience, to emotions you felt during it, to the clothes you were wearing at the time. If we simply bring ourselves back to a positive experience in our imagination, our brains will react in the same way as if we were actually there.

 3. Fifteen Minutes of Cardio

Doing fifteen minutes of cardio per day has been scientifically proven to be as effective as taking a daily anti-depressant. I could write more on this subject, but you’re probably already aware of the endless benefits of daily exercise. It puts you in a better mindset, releases endorphins, and promotes clearer thinking.

 4. Meditation

It’s hard to deny the remarkable short and long-term benefits of meditation; it helps to reduce stress, decrease anxiety, lower blood pressure, boost the immune system, increase optimism, and the list goes on. You can read about some of the science behind meditation here, here, and here. The goal is to slow down, be mindful, and focus on nothing but your breath for as little as two minutes every day. As long as you are consistent, you will see tremendous changes in your life due to this simple practice.

 5. Send a Positive Email

Before doing anything else in the morning, open up your computer and send one positive email or text to anybody who has had an impact on your life. It could be a thank you note to a middle school teacher, a coach, a professor, a co-worker, or even the hippie you randomly met at a festival. In his book, Shawn Achor describes a study done at Harvard that shows a significantly stronger correlation between happiness and social connection than the one between smoking and cancer. If you do nothing else, do this for twenty-one straight days. There is a much better chance that this simple practice will increase your levels of happiness than there is that you will get cancer from smoking. Make your messages personal and do it first thing in the morning.

If you want to start living a happier, healthier, and ultimately more successful and abundant life, try doing just one of the five things listed above every day. If you can, turn all five into daily habits; it may be easier than you think. If you brush your teeth for 2 minutes a day in order to have a healthier mouth, why not focus on keeping the most important part of your body healthy…? Your mind.

About the Author, Emily Cedar:

Emily is one of the “kids” who started The Kid Monks blog.  In addition to working on her blog, she loves to explore, create, travel, do crossfit, meditate, and chill outdoors.  She bleeds maize and blue and considers herself an optimist when it comes to Michigan Football.  You can contact Emily at emily@thekidmonks.com.

Image: Vishwas Krishna http://goo.gl/5KhRZ4