“Wear self love like a blanket of comfy cashmere” ~Anne-Sophie Reinhardt
Join me for this week’s interview on Monday, February 18 at 12 PM Central!
To listen to the interview, click HERE! I will be welcoming Anne-Sophie Reinhardt to my radio show this week!
We just celebrated Valentine’s Day last week. For most people, the celebration of the day is our love for others, which is so appropriate. So many times, we take other people, especially the people we’re closest to, for granted. We don’t take the time to let them know on a regular basis how much we truly and deeply love them. While every day could be Valentine’s Day, in reality it isn’t.
Don’t we sometimes take ourselves for granted too? Don’t we forget to tell ourselves how much we love ourselves? We often times are so good at reminding ourselves of our faults and shortcomings, and we ignore the good in who we are. Or, sometimes we feel that to tell ourselves how much we love ourselves we are being egotistical or narcissistic.
The reality is that we don’t give ourselves as much credit as we deserve, and we sell ourselves short. We tell ourselves that we are not deserving of heaps of love for ourselves, because if we feel we are deserving, there must be something wrong with us or we have some “unmet need” lurking out there somewhere. We neglect to offer ourselves some “self love,” and we suffer as a result. Ultimately, so many of our problems originate from self-image issues.
I am happy to say that today I am a healthy person; I am preparing for my first ever marathon! I just ran six miles yesterday, and I have run more in the past couple of weeks than I had in a week in a long time, and it feels great. It wasn’t always that way. I used to weigh 250 pounds. I was lazy, miserable, and unhealthy. Life was not as enjoyable back then. I certainly lacked self love and body love, and my suffering was tremendously great.
Having run the gamut, so to speak, of various levels of self love and body love, it provides me with an awesome perspective on how hard and how wonderful life can really be! I am so thrilled to welcome Anne-Sophie Reinhardt on to my radio show this week, because I know she offers such wonderful insight, perspective, and expertise on self love and body love, and I can’t wait to talk to her about it!
I came to know Anne-Sophie through a guest post on my friend Jodi Chapman’s blog last fall. I loved her message and visited her website. Since then, our paths have crossed across the “virtual landscape” a couple of times! We must have been destined to speak on my show! 🙂 I am thrilled to have her!
Anne-Sophie is an anorexia survivor, body image expert, self-love advocate and the author of The Ultimate Guide to a Healthy Body Image. Join her newsletter and receive your free 3-part video series empowering you to madly fall in love with yourself. If you haven’t already checked out her website, I highly recommend it!
Anne-Sophie has a book, which you can find on Amazon, titled The Ultimate Guide to a Healthy Body Image, and she is active on Facebook and Twitter as well, where she has already won the hearts of so many. I personally welcome you to join the large community of people already following Anne-Sophie on her wonderful journey by following her!
I can’t wait for our talk today, and I would really like it if you listened in as well! We’ll see you there!
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“Be willing take action. Make a difference and use your talent and gifts to make the world a better place.” ~Tess Marshall
Let me ask you a couple of questions.
Are you:
Hanging on by a thread?
Sick of being stuck in jobs, relationships and routines?
Ready to bust out of your comfort zone and live free?
Are you also ready to:
Get clear and commit to what you really want for yourself?
Make fear work for you instead of against you?
Go from imagining the worst to expecting the best?
Unearth your innate strength and freedom?
Find a sense of safety while living in a world of fear?
Step beyond your limitations and experience your true self?
Be confident. Live without apology, explanation or apprehension?
If you answered “yes” to any of those questions, I may have a solution for you! 🙂
Late last year, my friend Tess Marshall asked me to contribute to a new project she was working on. I was happy to oblige and help her out! It turns out that this new project is a wonderful program called “30 Days to Bold!” If you look at the picture up above, you can see my small portrait among the other contributors. I’m on the bottom row, second from the left! 🙂
Tess is author of the awesome blog, The Bold Life. Tess previously worked as a psychologist in private practice and currently works as a Courage Coach. She shares with you the invaluable wisdom and expertise she has gained through her work.
I thought that perhaps many of you don’t know who Tess is, or what her story is, and why she is positioned so well to be offering such a wonderful program, and I also wanted to share more information on the program just in case you may be interested in being a part of it!
Here’s my interview with Tess:
How did you become so bold?
I grew up on a produce farm with nine siblings. We were all very competitive for our parents love and attention. It was speak up or lose out. We also began working in the fields and at the Farmer’s Market as young children. At the market, we learned how to sell and turn our customers into friends! We became experts in sales by age 13! That’s a childhood of bold action.
My biggest challenge, thus far, was getting married and pregnant when I was 17, a senior in high school. Our only plan was “love!” I was the mom to four little girls at age 22. My third pregnancy was twins. We really didn’t have a plan until we began seeing a counselor 10 years later. That was a turning point. We finally had the tools needed to move forward in a healthy and happy manner. There is nothing more difficult than raising children. Nothing! I was only 38 when the twins graduated from high school.
A mother is a coach! I didn’t know it at the time, but they helped me become the courage coach I am today! There is no difference between you and I. Together, we can unearth your courageous self. It’s never too late. The time is now.
Tell us about a big fear that you’ve managed to overcome.
Hubs and I both lived in Michigan all our lives. When we were young and stuck, we decided we would move to the Southwest someday, after the girls left for college. We wanted to go to a warm climate!
In 2007, we finally made the move. When the economy was just beginning to go south, we decided it was “now or never.” He sold his business and I transitioned from a therapist in private practice to a courage coach. We sold our house but, at the time, were unable to sell our cottage. Hubs was hired as an accountant in Arizona the night before we left. He actually got the call while we were packing the truck.
It’s never too late to act on your dreams. You have to be willing to do what it takes even if it appears that things aren’t working out.
Whatever steps you take the Universe will meet you half way. We moved away from two daughters and their families. At the same time, another daughter transitioned from her teaching job to working as a flight attendant.
This meant, as her parents, we can fly free, anywhere Southwest flies! Since then, Southwest bought Air Tran and now we can fly to those destinations as well. We continue to go back to Michigan several times a year. For us, our family and grandchildren trump new adventures.
Don’t wait until your stars line up or the economy gets better. Our cottage just sold in August 2012. I’m so thankful we didn’t wait. Dream, plan and act today! You have the power. In 30 Days of Bold you’ll get the support and the map to uncover it and use it.
What is the most painful fear you can have?
The worst fear is one of feeling unloved and separate. All human beings have three things in common. We all want to give love, receive love and know that we matter. Once we live with an open heart and give and receive love freely, it’s impossible not to feel connected to the whole. Separation is an illusion.
How can we develop courage?
Be willing take action. Make a difference and use your talent and gifts to make the world a better place. Things will go wrong. So what? You’ll make mistakes. So what? You will be rejected. So what?
Keep going, ask for help, find support and be willing to do what it takes.
A favorite quote on fear: I have accepted fear as a part of life – specifically the fear of change…. I have gone ahead despite the pounding in the heart that says: turn back. ~Erica Jong 30 Days of Bold offers you the safety and support of a loving community. You don’t have to go it alone.
What inspires you to continue even when things get tough?
My family, friend, and The Bold Life tribe keep me inspired. I think it’s an exciting time to be alive. We can all help co-create a new world. I think the old ways are crumbling because they don’t work. Some would rather stay in their comfort zone, with the old, than venture out and discover the new. To move forward in faith and think that the best is yet to come takes courage. To know that I have the ability to share my gifts and talents, and that there is a need for them that nobody else can fulfill…that’s what inspires me.
What qualifies you to do this work?
I raised my family, I saved my marriage, became a successful therapist, a coach, an author, a professional speaker, a writer…I’ve achieved things I never would have thought possible in my life.
I’m only getting started! This course is the culmination of everything I’ve learned. For those of you who want to know how I did it, this course is for you! Begin today, with one small step in the right direction, and the tools to make new choices that support you in transcending your dreams.
Tell us about a difficult time and how you overcame your fear?
My daughter Kristy was born without a right hand. I was afraid for her. I knew life would be difficult at times and of course you want to save your kids from pain. I pushed her to do things she didn’t think she could. She also was determined to do what her sisters did.
Kristy learned how to play sports using her stub. She played basketball and soccer. She went on to the University of Chicago and played there for two years as well, before she reached her limits. Now she runs marathons, participates in triathlons and works for an athletic shoe company.
I didn’t let Kristy off the hook. Didn’t let her make excuses. She used to say when she was a little girl, “I can’t do the dishes because I only have one hand.” I’d reply, “Oh yes you can, it will just take you longer.” The way I overcame all my fears around my parenting and marriage was one step at a time.
What do you hope that people will take away after completing the course?
I want them to see that they are not alone and that there is nothing wrong with them. We all fail, we all make mistakes and we all have flaws. I want them to own their power and innate goodness. I want them to use their innate courage and have faith in themselves. I want to see them use their gifts, talents and to offer them to others along the path. When one of us succeeds, we all succeed in making the world a better place to live! Dennis Waitley said, “There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing.”
_________________________________________
This is an absolutely awesome course, and I am proud to be a part of it. Here’s more information on the course, in case you are interested in joining Tess and becoming more bold!
Here’s what you’re getting:
Every Monday you’ll receive directions in your inbox, with tools and techniques for rolling with comparison, rejection, attachment, grasping, desperation, jealousy, struggling, straining, demanding, and plotting. All those egotistical ways we self-sabotage.
30 Bold Days of genuine community and connection, guidance and inspiration and resources to kick start your bold and courageous life. Learn how to remove self-imposed barriers, avoid potholes and pitfalls, make fearless choices and flex your get-up-and-go muscles.
Access to the password protected, members only page, at The Bold Life, where you have access to everything. You can come back as often as you like. Lifetime access!
A Series of Personal Heartfelt Videos by “The Fearless People,” who share their stories on how they overcame their biggest fear and tips on how you can do the same.
A Series of Video Interviews by myself, and other trailblazers who went from fearful to fearless. We will inspire you and encourage you to move forward.
4 LIVE group-coaching Calls where I will offer guidance and answer questions.
Access to a private, life long, Facebook group, a place in which to thrive; receive ongoing positive support, discussions and for reporting brave moves.
My stories/guidance/wisdom Each week I share personal stories of difficult times, how I overcame them and achieved success.
Weekly, worksheets, lessons, activities, and encouragement for strengthening your courage muscles with small acts of bravery that will you lead to giant leaps.
Wonderful Goodies from my friends, who want to share their love and boldness, cheer you on, and contribute to your success.
Access to myself, via the private, Facebook group, where I comment and connect throughout the 30 Days.
Here’s the weekly breakdown:
Week 1: Bold: An Attitude, Belief, and Lifestyle We begin where we are and go at our own pace. We’ll discover how to think, speak, and act with courage in order to do the things we have delayed for so long. We’ll learn how to change our story, let go of limits, calm ourselves and transform our negative sense of self. It’s time to eliminate barriers, stay inspired and be unstoppable as we mold our lives like we desire.
Week 2: Face Your Fears and Change Your Life We’ll use the tools, guidance and wisdom needed to transform fear and doubt into powerful allies and messengers that lead to greater confidence, self-worth and deliberate action. In a safe environment, anything is possible.
Week 3: Create Your Vision, Map Your Strategy, Take Action Plan Our vision is a reminder of our long term benefits. We’ll plan the steps and activities that will lead us from impossible to possible and from fearful to fearless. Finally we’ll create an action plan that will help move us forward in any area of our life. We’ll gain the skills needed to never feel powerless again.
Week 4: The Guts to Be Extraordinary. Claim Your Power, Magic, & Genius We’ll cover how to control our response to the fears that we’ll inevitably come up against as we push the boundaries of our horizons. We’ll learn how to turn our fears into strengths as we persist in the creation of our reality. We embrace our abundance and create more love, trust, and satisfaction in life. We won’t get somewhere new. We become someone new. The only thing left to do is to soar!
Days 29 & 30 Review and Wrap Up and Celebration We strengthen our inner clarity and commitment as we become witnesses to our success. We honor ourselves with appreciation, commemoration, and gratitude. We are impressed by the gap between whom we used to be and who we are now.
When you register you’ll receive over $100 in bonus gifts that you can download immediately.
Success is written in your DNA. You were born whole, innocent, and courageous. You’re inadequate belief systems hold you back. Let us help you recover your power in order to go forth boldly and share your gifts with the world!
Sign up by 2/1/13 and you will also instantly receive FREE my “Take Your Fear and Shove It” ecourse. It has helped over 1000 people live free.
*Note: The links included above are affiliate links, which means that a portion of the enrollment goes toward vanquishing mental mediocrity and helping people discover their “inner awesomeness” worldwide! 🙂
Facebook user? Click the “Like” button below and get my newest publication, “Unlock Your Inner Awesome Today” for free! That’s it!
“You’ve gotta get out there and do things that make you feel good! Cause when your vibing at a high frequency, guess what manifests quicker and easier into your life? Your desires!” ~Elise McDowell
Join me for this week’s interview on Monday, February 11 at 12 PM Central!
To listen to this week’s interview, click HERE! I will be welcoming Elise McDowell to my radio show this week!
I’ve been conducting interviews and meeting enough people to know when I am having a conversation with a very wise and insightful person. When I had the opportunity to speak to Elise, who is about half a world away from me, I could tell I was talking to a very wise young woman who has a lot to offer! As I began my conversation with Elise, I shared with her that I couldn’t recall how I found her within the blogosphere and on the web, but whatever it was I knew that I was instantly attracted to her message and energy, and I knew I had to get her on my show to share the wonderful things she is doing. I was so pleased when I finally had the opportunity to interview her, because I did realize she does have a lot to offer all of us, and I believe she is a star in the making.
We had our interview set up for a few months, so neither of us really could have predicted that this interview came along at a wonderful time for Elise. She had just embarked on a new direction for her site and her work, integrating her previous “Inner Vibrance Project” work within her new look and theme, which is based on the concept of “manifesting.” Elise specifically talks about manifesting three things: adventure, luxury, and vibrance. I asked her specifically why she picked those three areas, and I was blown away by her response. I won’t give it away — you’ll have to listen to the interview to find out why I was so moved by her answer to that question.
If you don’t know about Elise, I would like you to get to know her. She’s a wonderful young woman who stands to offer the world some wonderful wisdom and guidance. She describes herself as a “kick-ass manifesting coach who helps energize women to create adventure, luxury and vibrance in their lives.” If you want tolearn to allow more freedom, time and abundance into your life make sure you get on over to her site and sign up for her free manifesting guide ‘Rapid Manifesting: A Mini Guide To Getting Everything You Want‘. I had a chance to check it out myself, and you can just feel her energy radiating from the pages! It’s a great guide — so go get it for free!
Because of the time zone difference (she is already into tomorrow compared to me), we arranged an interview ahead of broadcast time. I will be airing the interview live at my usual time, and I hope you take the opportunity to hear the wonderful things I learned from this bright star. Grab a seat and listen in. You won’t be disappointed! 🙂
Facebook user? Click the “Like” button below and get my newest publication, “Unlock Your Inner Awesome Today” for free! That’s it!
“You are a spirit with a soul who is having a human experience.” ~Nick Bunick
Tuesdays are a weekly highlight for me. I get the opportunity to join my older daughter for lunch. I go to her school, and I get to sit with a bunch of first graders and eat with them. If you have never had the opportunity to get a front-row seat to hear the conversations that take place at the lunch table, you’re missing out. It’s quite the experience.
For example, I usually get this:
First grader: “Mr. Schueller…”
Me: “What?”
First grader: “You said it!”
Me: “Said what?”
First grader: “You said it! We’re playing the ‘what’ game. You said ‘what!’ You lose!”
And on it goes. It never gets old for them, and to be honest, it really doesn’t get old for me either. I know that these years of youthful innocence are numbered, and I’ll take it in and enjoy it for all it’s worth.
In addition to the lunchtime antics, I frequently get reports on the daily happenings in first grade from my older daughter. It’s not unusual for her to fill me in on the latest “drama” that occurs in first grade. It’s usually on par with the “what game” stuff. Someone said they’d give them a pack of gum if they’d let them cut in line, and then they don’t follow through; kids taking things from other kids; arguments over whether someone really “hypnotizes” another student simply by looking at them for one minute straight…All that kind of “trivial” material that consumes the social life of a first grader. When compared to the worries of an adult, these “first grade worries” seem so insignificant and so small…
I think of our journey here on this planet the same way. Some of us on this planet are consumed in proverbial “what games” and so full of fear and worrying about what we stand to lose. Then there are some of us on this planet who are just oozing with spiritual maturity — their self control and patience is through the roof, and they are admired by many for their mastery of self and spirit.
I had the opportunity to do a phone interview with Nick Bunick, author of several books. In his book titled, Time For Truth, he says what he said to me during our talk, when I asked him what the meaning of life was, and why we were here on this planet. In essence, he says to visualize a pyramid with a thousand steps inside of you, and at the top of this pyramid is the universal spirit/infinite wisdom/God. He says, “The purpose of your life is to climb the steps, one at a time, until you reach the top and become at one” with that universal spirit/infinite wisdom/God. Nick also says that he estimates the average person is at around step 200; some are lower and some are higher. Some are in higher “grades” and making higher progress on their personal pyramid, and some are in lower “grades” and struggling spiritually.
What are the means by which we can reach the top? By embracing “universal love and compassion.” That’s it!
Now, I know it’s easy to look around and cast a judgmental eye on those who do not exercise love and compassion toward others. It’s not hard to find people who are glaring examples of the opposite of love and compassion. Just turn on the news. However, we need to work on setting aside that judgment and passing that universal love and compassion to others, even if they haven’t come around to embracing it themselves.
It helps for me to simply think about those people as being in a “different grade” spiritually. They are at a different place. Just as we don’t get “angry” at first graders for being first graders, with their “what games” and “trivial concerns,” we can move away from being angry at those who don’t practice love and compassion. Just as an adult is not any better than a first grader — just older — a more “spiritually advanced” individual is no better than someone who is at a different “step” on their personal spiritual pyramid.
I usually endorse the famous quote, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do,” during those times when it’s so easy to pick apart and judge someone who is doing something differently than I would in that same situation. I’m no better. I may be in a different “grade,” I may be on a different “step” on my pyramid, but I can’t get angry; again, I am no better. That usually helps me get through it.
So, what step on your personal “pyramid” do you think you are on? Are you still struggling to embrace universal love and compassion? Is love and compassion something you can do on a part-time basis, but you still need work on making it a more full-time practice? I know that’s where I am…I am getting better, but I still need work on making it a full-time behavior. I have a long way to go, but I have also come a long way!
Climb those steps. Embrace that “universal love and compassion.” Refrain from judging others — just extend to them that same “universal love and compassion,” and help them on their way. That universal spirit is right there, within you — and the higher you climb on your own personal pyramid, the closer you will get to sharing with the world that wonderful you that resides right there inside of you!
“You can’t change a Quirk or a Jerk, but you can change how you perceive them.” ~Faye Kufahl
Join me for this week’s interview on Monday, February 4 at 12 PM Central!
To listen to this week’s interview, click HERE! I will be welcoming “Quirks and Jerks” expert Faye Kufahl to my radio show this week!
Last year, I attended a Wisconsin Speakers Association – Wisconsin Chapter meeting, and I met a delightful woman there. We had such a wonderful long conversation, and I walked away thinking about her huge compassionate heart and wonderful message. I am so delighted that I have the opportunity to share her message with you on my radio show this week!
We have all had those encounters that make us feel a bit uncomfortable — those encounters with someone who appears to be a bit “odd,” or very “different” than we are. We may suspect that they may have a mental illness, or that there is some other issue at hand, but we don’t know how to deal with our feelings when it comes to our interactions with them. We may see them homeless, walking the street, or perhaps we may encounter them as we are volunteering at a shelter.
Our interactions with people who have these “odd behaviors” may not be on the street or in a shelter — they may be in our homes; they may be at our workplaces, or they may be in our neighborhoods. We may notice them, or we may actually become frustrated with them if we have to deal with them on a regular basis. It’s easy for us to look at these people who we consider “different” than us and become judgmental or angry. It’s easy for us to “de-humanize” them and cast them off as being “less-than-human.” The reality is that they are just as human as we are — they are somebody’s child, brother, sister, or friend. They are somebody, and we need to change the way we think about these issues. That’s why I am so delighted to have Faye join me today!
Faye is a Quirks and Jerks Expert. Faye has spent a lifetime dedicated to serving people who are chronically mentally ill. When she was a young girl, her older sister was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. For much of her childhood, Faye witnessed first hand what it was like to live in the often-misunderstood spiral of mental illness. As licensed social worker Faye interacts on an intensely personal level, helping people live a better quality of life while coping with their illnesses.
She is the author of two books addressing the topics of weird and wonderful behavior of quirks, jerks, and mental illness. A gifted actress, Faye embodies characters to illustrate odd behaviors and gives real-world strategies to cope with the quirks and jerks. Growing up in Nutterville, Wisconsin, (No kidding! Nutterville) with a one-room school house, a colorful community, and an older sister diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, Faye learned the lesson of compassion and how to cope with extreme behavior very young. Her poignant memories and thoughtful insights are the basis of her first book, Nutterville. Faye didn’t realize the uniqueness of her perspective until she left to pursue her passion for opera in college and explored the world outside Nutterville.
Her struggles to cope with her husband’s mental illness is chronicled in her second book, Prisoner of God. Earning her degree in social work, escaping to a shelter for abused and battered women, and making a new life for herself led to a career helping other people understand mental illness. Faye has a unique combination of experience as a family member, professional member, and member of society at large in coping with quirks and jerks. She has always been an observer of behavior and how to handle difficult situations. Heralding her 60th birthday, she is more determined than ever to share these experiences in a positive way by helping others learn how to interact with the very different people in our culture.
Faye is also a great nature lover and a lover of all things that are gentle and kind. She lives with Bill Krupinski at the edge of the mighty Rock River that flows through Wisconsin. She is enthralled with the migration of birds and all the beauty of her area. If you would like to find out more about the important work Faye is doing, I invite you to visit her website: www.QuirksandJerks.com. I am so delighted to have the opportunity to discuss this important issue with Faye, and I invite you to listen in on our conversation today!
Facebook user? Click the “Like” button below and get my newest publication, “Unlock Your Inner Awesome Today” for free! That’s it!
“To really ‘live,’ that is to find life reasonably satisfying, you must have an adequate and realistic self image that you can live with. You must find your self acceptable to ‘you.’ You must have a wholesome self-esteem. You must have a self that you can trust and believe in. You must have a self that you are not ashamed to ‘be,’ and one that you can feel free to express creatively, rather than to hide or cover up. You must have a self that corresponds to reality so that you can function effectively in a real world. You must know yourself—both your strengths and your weaknesses and be honest with yourself concerning both. Your self-image must be a reasonable approximation of ‘you,’ being neither more than you are, nor less than you are.” ~Maxwell Maltz
About a year and a half ago I decided to attend a conference for professional speakers. It was a great weekend — I met some really nice people, and I learned a lot in the process. One of the treats of the weekend was getting the opportunity to learn from one of the “big names” in the speaking industry, and I walked away with a wealth of information to use from here on out. Overall, it was a productive weekend.
How do you do when walking into a new environment — when you know you’re going somewhere where you know you won’t know anybody, and where you will be asked over and over again to introduce yourself and answer questions about yourself? Are you nervous? Are you a bit fearful? Truth to be told, I have never been comfortable at events like this in the past. I never was a fan of these types of events, partially because I felt like I didn’t “belong” there with the other people. I felt that the “others” were more experienced, polished, and “worthy” of being there than I. Have you ever experienced that sort of “I really don’t fit in here with all these people” moment? I think we have all experienced that nervousness somewhere along the line. Maybe we still do to this day!
Where do you believe those feeling come from? I believe that the feeling of fear and nervousness comes from a perception of how we “measure up” to other people. I believe that we assign a relative “worth” to others, and then compare it to ourselves. What do we use to assign this “worth?” Perhaps it’s experience; perhaps it’s charisma and confidence. Perhaps it’s how “well known” someone is in the public sector. Can you relate? Have you ever met someone who was a “guru” of some sort, or another “famous” person, and felt so overwhelmed and just in awe, simply because you were in their presence?
So, let me ask you a question…Take away all the “perceptions” of “worth” that you have about this “famous” person, and what do we have? We have just another person. Another person, just like you and me. No more, and no less. This was the realization I had as I approached that weekend of the conference. I had reached a point where I had found myself in a mindset that was calming and reassuring, with no pressure or nervousness. I realized that it was my own “self image” which had been holding me back at events like this in the past. It was all a creation of my own mind. It was my own “measuring up” and comparing myself to others that was leading to my apprehensions. Once I figured this out, everything changed.
I no longer worried what other people thought of me; I didn’t care if people liked me or not. I had confidence in my abilities and I felt that I was “worthy” and that I “belonged” right there with everyone else. I felt extremely comfortable working the floor, and talking with other people. Were there people who had experienced more “success” than I? Absolutely! Were there people there who had more experience than I? Without a doubt! I didn’t care!
On the second day of the conference, the featured speaker arrived. During a break in the session, there was a long line of people who were waiting in line to shake a hand, get an autograph, or get a photograph. While I recognized that this person is well known (throughout the world) and extremely successful, I didn’t feel the need or desire to jump in the line. Truth to be told, this speaker would never remember who I was anyway, so what would I really gain from this possible encounter? The opportunity to say I “shared” the stage with this “world renowned” personality? Sure, I guess!
Don’t get me wrong — it’s not about ego here. It’s not about me feeling I need to boost myself up and pretend that I don’t care who this person is. I care, but I don’t care that much. I was at peace with myself. I felt comfortable in my own skin, for once, and I didn’t care who was in the room, who I met or didn’t meet. I didn’t care if I rubbed shoulders with the “right” people, or got in on the “right” new ventures that were out there waiting for me. I didn’t care!
Why do we worry if we don’t measure up? So much suffering comes from the attachment we have to feeling that we are deemed “of worth” by others. We don’t need to worry about what others think. It only serves the ego. Simple acceptance of the fact that we are who we are is enough. If we love ourselves, the rest doesn’t matter.
When we boost others up and then end up feeling bad about who we are as a result, we only feel less than “good enough” because we now believe we don’t “measure up.” We do it to ourselves. We can end up loving ourselves less, and in the process feel down and depressed, or even angry or jealous of others.
Don’t worry about measuring up to others. Feelings of “worth” are only creations of our minds. When we simplify who we are and what we are, what are we? We are flesh and bone; further reduced, we are just the elements of the earth — nothing less, and nothing more. We are all cut from the same cloth. We are great beings of spirit, residing in the machinery of the body. We are all connected and equal with each other. We are all here to accomplish the same thing, which is to learn how to become more compassionate and loving toward other beings.
If we learn to support each other, there is no room for judgment, jealousy, or negativity. We can always make more room for love in our hearts, and squeeze out that space which is dedicated to negativity, aggression, and hostility.
Don’t worry about what other people think. We can just ask ourselves what we think. We can ask ourselves how can we live our lives with more love and compassion. Perhaps it’s just simply smiling toward another person to make their day better. Besides, don’t you think that’s the way we were destined to live — with a smile on our faces?
I know that I was smiling the entire weekend, because I had reached a place of peace and self contentment. I was smiling in the car; I was smiling at the airport (even humming while waiting in line). I was smiling at the conference, and I smiled all the way back home. I felt great! I loved being me!
“Measuring up” to others only holds us back. It’s time to let go of our need to feel “worthy” of others’ acceptance. It’s time to be content with who we are. After all, we are awesome inside — and it’s time we start finding it! We are great!
I will be welcoming to my radio show Kenneth Vogt of Vera Claritas to my radio show this week!
It’s a small world, and you never know who you’re going to meet online through mutual channels. Kenneth and I currently live pretty far away from each other, geographically, but at one time we didn’t live too far from each other. Kenneth is a former Wisconsin resident (born and raised here), residing within a couple hours’ drive from where I currently live! It’s going to be wonderful talking with a fellow Mid-Westerner, although I am venturing to guess that he’ll be speaking to me from a warmer climate than mine. 🙂 Nevertheless, I am delighted to introduce you to Kenneth, so you can hear what he has to say about what he does!
Who is Kenneth Vogt? He is a man who has “been there, done that.” He had a stodgy title at a traditional company (controller for a manufacturer), a sexy title at a splashy company (Principal Solutions Architect for a fabulously successful dot com), but mostly he has been an entrepreneur for over 30 years. Kenneth created one of the first e-commerce web sites for a Fortune 500 company way back in 1997 and he has rode the internet ever since. Having worked in entrepreneurial enterprises large and small, he is uniquely qualified to provide clarity about what it takes to create, run and even recreate life-sustaining businesses.
Kenneth has lived and worked all over the US, Europe, and most recently Mexico, where he currently resides with his family. He speaks several languages poorly (Spanish, Hindi, Punjabi) and English quite well.
Don’t forget to check out Kenneth’s website, www.veraclaritas.com, and get a free clarity guide!
We’re going to talk about what “Vera Claritas” means, as well as talk about something called, “life-sustaining entrepreneurship.” I am predicting a very engaging and informative conversation today! I invite you to listen in on our conversation!
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“And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.” ~Marianne Williamson
You have no idea how good it feels to be writing this post. The last time I wrote a real, true blog post was last year — December 18 — over a month ago! It’s a busy time of year for me. I teach college courses, and I had some other engagements that consumed my time and energy, and I knew my blog would always be waiting for me when I got back into it, and now is that time!
It’s funny when you get a chance to spend some time away from writing a couple times a week how your mind continues to accumulate ideas and thoughts, and I have been taking a lot of time to reflect on who I am and what I am. Even though I wasn’t writing, I was thinking — every day — about what the new year was going to mean to me and for me. I realized that while I have been growing and evolving, it’s time to continue the process and come into my own and focus on one primary objective.
Since I take my work very seriously, I continually search for ways to magnify my message and reach more people. I have found no problem finding people who are willing to provide their two cents (and more). I get emails by the ton every day, with suggestions on how to build an empire of followers and how to dominate social media. I get videos with lots of ideas and read blogs and books with even more ideas on how to be successful and how to take my speaking and writing career to the next level. One idea I have heard over and over again is that to be successful you have to be controversial. Those who support this idea claim that you have to write something that causes a “commotion” so you can go viral and get noticed. That’s not me…Sorry. I know plenty of people who aren’t controversial and are tremendously successful. If I am not that way in everyday life, I am not going to be that on my blog or anywhere in the public!
Let me tell you what I am and what I am not. What I am is someone who cares — who really cares about people, and helping them live better tomorrow than they did today. That’s who I am! What I am not is someone who uses people as stepping stones so I can climb the ladder of success. If you care enough to read this, or any of my posts, or if you care enough to watch my videos or listen to my radio show, then let me tell you this — I care about you! Truly! If you have ever talked with me or have met me, you know what you see is what you get. I am what I am. And that’s all that I am (thanks Popeye!)
For years I have worried about what people thought about me. Since I have been in the public eye as a blogger and writer, I worried about saying the “wrong” thing and “losing” followers. I was so concerned with image and words that I was sometimes ashamed or tentative about sharing an idea or two. While I was authentic, I wasn’t “fully” authentic, and that has bothered me.
I don’t know if it’s maturity finally catching up with me, or a level of spiritual growth, but I can sense that things are changing within me. I can sense that I am shifting and moving. I feel more at peace with myself and in my world. I am losing that sense of attachment to certain material things and viewing the world through a different lens. I feel like I am breaking free. I feel liberated, and I feel ready to embark on a new journey, and I hope you are ready to come with me!
I have a Facebook page; if you haven’t visited it yet and/or if you haven’t “liked” the page yet, I would appreciate it if you stopped by. I share inspirational quotes and ideas several times a day. On my Facebook page early this year, I shared with my followers what my concentration was going to be on this year, and I want to share it with you.
This year, I am going to focus on being a “lightworker.” I know — when I first heard this term, I thought that it meant to take on less of a load — I thought it meant to work “lighter.” This isn’t the case. My work as a “lightworker” is to let my light shine and by doing so help others find their “light.” I am going to do whatever I can to help you find that inner greatness that is within you. I want you to be able to take those things that you do that you’re not happy about or proud of, and replace them with a new you — the “authentic and awesome” you that resides within you, just waiting to come out.
We all have a greatness that lies within us. Some of us can see it every day, while some of us are so inundated with drama, despair, frustration, anxiety, and daily problems that we can’t find it. I want to help you “flip the switch,” and find that inner greatness that resides within you. I want to help you find that light that can burn strongly within your heart, and completely change your life for the better — and for good!
Are you ready to “flip the switch?” Are you ready to embark on a journey of discovery of the personal greatness you possess? I really hope so! It’s time to stop settling for being just mediocre. It’s time to stop settling for good enough, and not happy enough. It’s time to be great. It’s time to stop being affected by negativity that may surround us; it’s time to stop getting angry at ourselves or others; it’s time to stop letting old habits limit our tremendous potential; it’s time to learn to be more loving and compassionate toward others and find patience. It’s time to reach within and pull out that wonderful spirit within you that can bring happiness to you and blessings to those around you. It’s time! Let’s do it!
I’ve had so much time to reflect, and I have so much to share. I feel refreshed and renewed! I look forward to a year of blessings and growth! I look forward to spending it with you. Great things are yet to come, and if you stick with me, you’ll figure out that great things are yet to come with you!
Shine on! Shine on! Let’s flip the switch and let the light shine!
It’s funny how things go with online networks, especially when you are new to a certain “area,” and you are learning who people are and building community with those who do what you do online. I had been following a Facebook profile called “Zen Mama” for quite some time, and I also frequented the Zen Mama website, because I enjoyed reading the inspirational posts and quotes. Last year, I came across an article from the “Zen Mama” about the concept of the “monkey mind,” and I shared a link to it on my blog. Betsy was kind enough to notice that the article’s link was shared, and she contacted me to let me know she appreciated the mention. The next thing you know, we are talking about having her join me on my radio show!
We talked, and did the interview, and then shortly after that, as I started to get to know more and more bloggers, we crossed paths again through mutual association, because we both had mutual blogging friends who knew each other. It’s funny how “small” the “world” can be sometimes!
This book is a great starting point for someone who knows that their life isn’t quite where they know they want it to be, but perhaps they don’t know where to turn or where to start. As Betsy shares in her book description on Amazon.com, “This daily meditation book is filled with inspirational quotes, beautiful photography and an “I AM” affirmation on each page to help you become a better person. Start your day with this book. Imagine a hope, dream or future you want and turn to a page that will answer that thought. Or just read from the beginning to end. Incorporate these meditations with your daily breathing, yoga or a cup of tea or coffee. Savor each page and let it set the tone for the day. A great book for everyone – parents, grandparents, graduates and students of life!”
I first met Sandra about a year and a half ago in California at a conference. We had a great conversation, and I made sure I had gotten her business card. At the time I had met her, she was doing wonderful work, helping people deal with grief. Fast forward to a few months ago, and I had received an email from Sandra, when she was happy to announce that her new book was published! I asked her if she would be interested in joining me to talk about her book, and she graciously accepted.
Sandra Champlain is the author of the new book We Don’t Die – A Skeptic’s Discovery of Life After Death. She recorded the free audio “How to Survive Grief” which has now been heard by almost 3000 people in 15 countries. She is also a chef and travels the United States and Canada feeding race car teams and she owns a 21 year old business in Connecticut – Kent Coffee and Chocolate Company.
Sandra’s book was fantastic. It took me on a journey that not only covers death and dying (and beyond), but through it’s easy-to-digest writing style, I learned a lot about life! Within the pages of the book is a story of greatness that we all possess, wonderful powers and abilities many of us can’t even begin to appreciate (until we try) and so many wonderful and helpful resources sprinkled in throughout this wonderful publication.
I can’t even begin to talk about all the things Sandra mentions in her book, but I’ll try — she talks about the “voice” that lives within us, continually telling us that we’re not good enough or deserving; she mentions how the human body possesses supreme abilities that we usually don’t tap into; she talks about life after death; there is discussion with communicating with those who have passed (and how to attempt to do so); there are lessons on dying; there are passages about gratitude and forgiveness; you can learn steps on how to “supercharge your life.” So much information is at your disposal in this book.
One of the passages that I liked best in Sandra’s book was this:
“What forgiveness means is to stop being resentful towards someone. I heard someone say once that resentment is like taking rat poison, then waiting for the other person to die. Resentment is painful and can eat us up inside. Forgiveness is simply giving up the right to be resentful. Whether the person did something right or wrong, you are no longer going to have the rat poison killing you from the inside out. I urge you now to forgive and let go of any resentment you may have toward a person or yourself. A special ingredient you can add to forgiving someone is compassion. Remember, the best place to stand in an argument is on the other person’s side.”
Please join us for a wonderful conversation about life, death, and so much more!
I invite you to listen to my conversation with Sandra today!
