Run With Those Who Get It | VictorSchueller.com

Tired of “drama” on Facebook? Need some positive inspiration? Follow me on Facebook and I promise to add positivity to your day!

The following is a guest post from Chance Scoggins

Two and a half years ago, my friend Debbie began to sense it was a time for a change. Her husband had been very successful in his work, but as the economy and his industry took a downturn, it was impossible to predict the future. It felt unwise to trust that work would flow as freely as it always had, or that his position would remain secure. Debbie had never worked outside of her home, but the kids were growing up and moving out. She wanted to contribute and to be proactive. She began to dream.

All eyes were on her when she stepped out to start her own business. She’d raised incredible kids and had served her community well, but with no actual business experience, everything she faced was for the first time. Everything she attempted was from square one. Facing a thousand fears and shortcomings along the way, I watched my friend begin to build something from nothing.

She rebuilt herself in the process.

From my vantage point, it was beautiful and inspiring to see. But I wasn’t the only one watching. Rumors and criticism flew all around her, behind her back and to her face.

“Evidently, they’re in pretty bad shape if she’s working.”
“She’s not built for that. I give it six months.”
“It’d be great if it worked out, but let’s be realistic…”

Those are all statements I heard early on – all from her friends. From genuine, love her, appreciate her, wouldn’t trade her for the world friends. I was dumbfounded – and even offended on her behalf. I mean, if the people you’ve invested your life in can’t find it in themselves to support you as you step out – if they can’t find a way to tangibly help – if they tear you down instead… was the friendship ever real? If not, you’re alone in ways you never even considered. And if those who know you best and love you most think you don’t have it in you, are you nuts to disagree?

Most of what was being said made it’s way back to Debbie. When I asked her how she didn’t let it discourage her, she said, “Chance, of course it discourages me. How could it not? But I’m doing it anyway. I have to. This is my road and my future – not anyone else’s.”

And she kept walking. Step by step, bit by bit, she built her business, and continues to. Less than three years later, not only is she bringing home a salary that people work their entire career to earn, she’s also employing several people and supporting others to follow in her footsteps. She’s taken a lot of pressure off her husband, and together, they’re dreaming dreams and serving in ways that seemed impossible just a few short years ago. I’ve never seen them happier, more fulfilled, or more effective.

Recently, I asked her if she could start over, knowing what she knows now, what would she do differently. She didn’t hesitate. She said, ”It’s easy. I’d run with those who get it, and ignore those who don’t.”

I can’t get those words out of my mind.

“Chance, I spent so much time and energy trying to convince people I wasn’t crazy. And I spent as much time trying to convince myself I wasn’t crazy, even though they thought I was. What I know now is if someone doesn’t offer you their support, it doesn’t automatically mean they don’t love you or want you to win. It just means they don’t get it yet. That’s about them – not about you. Some people won’t get it until you’ve done it. And many times, the people you most expect to be there for you just won’t be. Don’t take it personally, and don’t waste precious time and energy trying to convince them to get on board. They’re not meant to be part of your team. Move on. Find someone who gets it. Find your team. Pour into them, and let them pour into you. Run with those who get it.”

That advice has saved me a lot of heartache. When I started this blog in January, I had no idea if anyone would read it. I had nightmares of my closest twenty-five friends and family members reading – and no one else. The truth is, some of those twenty-five haven’t gotten on board. And at another point in my life, it would have crushed me. But because of Debbie’s wise words, I fully embrace the idea that some will be on my team and others won’t… and that’s okay. It’s designed to be that way. Instead of focusing on those who don’t get it, I’m pouring into those who do, and they’re pouring even more into me.

We can try to force the people in our circle to be our team, or we can step beyond our circle and discover the team that’s waiting for us.

Friends, if you’re attempting something bigger than you’ve been, you will undoubtedly have critics attempting to keep you in your box, making sure you know your rightful place. Many times, that’s their own personal fear spilling out onto you. They can’t help but view your attempts through the lens of what they would do.

You scare them for trying.

If you’ve got critics –
It might be because you’re living an uncommon life.
It might be because you’re reaching beyond yourself and the status quo.
Your critics will refine you.
They’ll make you answer the questions that will banish your fear.
You’ll convince yourself as you convince them.
And don’t worry… They’ll understand someday.
They’ll see it once you’ve done it.

But in the meantime, run with those who get it.

Chance Scoggins is the author of a brave living blog, and is also an award-winning music producer. Grab his free eBook, Quotable, here.

Photo source: gozdeo