Do You Persist or Give up When a Working Relationship Is a Struggle? | VictorSchueller.com

By Dr. Victor Schueller | communication

What happens when you want something to work so badly that you’ll try almost anything to make it happen?

What happens if you fail?  Do you keep persisting, or do you throw in the towel and give up?

That’s a tough question, because there’s the mindset and philosophy that you won’t get anywhere without hard work, but at the same time, there’s also a philosophy that things “happen for a reason.”

So, when things don’t work out, is it because we just haven’t come upon the solution that works, like Thomas Edison, who endured thousands of failures, but persisted through them until he created working inventions?  Or, is it because it’s the “universe” telling us that the reason it’s not working is because it’s just not meant to be, and to push through that would just mean more pain, suffering, and failure?

Let’s say you work with someone, and you just don’t seem to hit it off.  As much as you try to make that working relationship work, you can work together, but it’s never a close working relationship.  No matter what you try, and no matter what things you try, it’s a struggle and nothing improves the relationship.

Are you going to keep persisting, because you simply haven’t come up with the solution that works, or are you going to chalk it up to “fate” and throw in the towel on the hopes for anything more than a functional working relationship?

Functional versus personal

Here’s my thought on the matter: When it comes to you working on something that is more of a functional process — something that doesn’t require the cooperative efforts of another being, such as another person, the old “try and keep trying” adage may serve you well.  If it’s about you being the sole individual involved in a process, like trying to get something to be functional, trying to invent something, or trying to create something, this naturally is going to lend itself to failures and revisions along the way.

However, when the dynamics of another being are involved, this is where it gets a little tougher to know how to proceed.  People are electromagnetic emitters and receivers.  They send out and receive waves of energy.  Even if you’re dealing with someone who isn’t aware of this or in tune with the energy exchanged between two people, they still are affected by it and still emit that energy.

Here’s the thing — the energy they are putting “out there” is a result of their own body’s physiological processes.  This means that if a person is happy, they’ll be emitting a certain type of energy signal, and if they are not happy, they’ll emit another.

Simply put, if someone is just not “into you,” their energy is going to be a reflection of that, and it will not be in sync with yours if you are more “into” a working relationship with them.

When you have two frequencies that are not in congruence with each other there is dissonance and interference.  There will not be harmony of the frequencies.  So, you can try and try again, but if every time they’re just not “into it” as much as you are, things won’t amount to much more than polite and professional interactions.  And, that’s not such a bad thing.  It is much better than impolite and unprofessional interactions!

In this case, chalk it up to a big “universal” message which is saying to you it just “isn’t meant to be.”

Just walk away

That’s right.  Just walk away.  Likes attract likes, and you’re just not “like” that other person.  No hard feelings.  It may be a blessing in disguise.  There may be a very good reason why you don’t match up with them.

When it comes to dealing with other people, in my humble opinion, when it’s just not working, don’t sweat it, and don’t try to push through it, hoping that some miracle will occur and things will magically work out.  That is, however, unless the other person is equally aware of the energy dynamic, and is sensitive to it and also wants to make it work out.  When two people cooperatively are aware and willing to work on the relationship because they identify the importance of a coherent working relationship, you really can both work at it over and over to get things to work.  And, chances are, if you’re both coming from that place, things will work out in the end in your favor.

However, if the other person is not aware and not participating in making that relationship work, and things aren’t lining up for you, in my opinion it just isn’t meant to be and it’s better for you to pursue meaningful working relationships with other people who are more like you and interested in a coherent working relationship and all it has to offer.  There’s often a reason why some relationships work and others don’t, and often the reason lies in the invisible factors we cannot see nor appreciate much of the time.  But, these factors are very real.

Relationships take work, yes, but usually the work comes after you both have determined the relationship is worth something.  If you’re working hard on the front end just trying to make it worth something, you’re probably spending more time and effort than it’s worth, and it’s time to walk away.

Did you find this article helpful?  Please let me know what you thought in the comments below!

Photo: http://www.freeimages.com/gallery/ambrozjo

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